Lie #25: Circumstances are a result of actions

I am almost 44 years old and I have never been married. I have never really had a boyfriend. There are messages that sometimes reach my ears that these things must be my fault—or, in other words, this circumstance must be a result of my actions—things I may have done or didn’t do. People have asked me if I have done this-or-that in order to find a husband, and I have wondered myself if I have missed opportunities and failed to merit something on my own. It’s not that I haven’t tried. And I have spent a lot of time wondering what I did wrong to find myself where I am. I guess hearing that philosophy (that blessings or circumstances happen as a result of action or lack of action) and it making sense to me caused me to believe that. Many of us probably believe it, just because we may not understand and it’s the only way to explain why we’re not where we expect to be.

But now I know it’s a lie. Where we find ourselves in life is not really a result of things we have done or didn’t do. I feel like the truth is that there is a master plan—a plan that my Heavenly Parents and I created together in the premortal life, and I am simply carrying out that plan. Therefore, my circumstances are a result of my belief and intent. This belief and intent has been in force for longer than I can currently conceive. I am simply following my plan. This means that I haven’t done anything wrong, and that I haven’t missed any important opportunities. Everything has happened as it was supposed to happen—the good, the bad, anything that appeared to be a mistake—it was all part of this master plan. It’s time to stop rejecting the parts I don’t like and just accept what is. If I created this plan, together with God, then I need to trust that we knew what we were doing and that I am eventually going to reach the circumstances in life that I desire. Until then, I plan to be at peace with right now.


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2 thoughts on “Lie #25: Circumstances are a result of actions

  1. Cheryl says:

    There is so much about life that we cannot control. I have definitely found the direction my ship sails is not completely within my control. We do what we can, lay plans and live letting life unfold.
    You are such an amazing person! I am so thankful for your friendship!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Valerie Lindeman says:

    Wow! It is amazing that I have come to this same conclusion in my life recently. Being unmarried at 43 too, I have also wondered what I have been doing wrong or what opportunities I didn’t take advantage of. But I have reached a point where I trust my Heavenly Father that this has been His plan for me. Thanks for sharing, Rochelle.


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